The 13rd of Monstemper!

Me am carton of hate.
Me am wedge of spite.
Me am carton of hate!
Me am wedge of spite!
We am Milk and Cheese.
We am Milk and Cheese!
We both gone bad. We just ain't right.
We big ass laffs am too hardcore.
You no deserve anymore.
We am Milk and Cheese, buy our records please.
Our aim's to sell so go to Hell!

...bud-ump bud-ump Ba-ba-bada-bud-ump,
bud-ump bud-ump Ba-ba-bada-bud-ump,
bud-ump bud-ump Ba-ba-bada-bud-ump,
bud-ump bud-ump Ba-ba-bada-bud-ump,
bud-ump bud-ump Ba-ba-bada-bud-ump,...
... ...
...ba-ba-ba-bump-bump-bump
ba-ba-ba-bump-bump-bump
ba-ba-ba-bump-bump-bump
ba-ba-ba-bump-bump-bump
ba-ba-ba-bump-bump-bump,...
... ...

Fear us suckers, fear our truth!
Mindless violence beyond reproof.
Am we evil? So some claim.
But society am to blame!
Start riot, lose control.
We am gods of rock and roll!
Give me beer, give me gin.
We liquored up so let mayhem begin!

God Made Us Funky!
God Made Us Funky!
God Made Us Funky!
God Made Us FUCK!

HEY KIDS!!!

Me no hear you come in. Me was just jamming to one of me good friends bands. Me would tell you who, but they no pay me enough. You know me. Me do NOTHING without endorsement deal!

So here we am, almost half way though month of Monstee and all me been doing am ranting. That am just not right. Now that things seem to be running smoothing with all them that me rhetorically bitch slapped yesterday, me think it am time me get down to really making fun of to ridicule and laughing at to examining human possibilities with some new people.

Not too long ago good friend of mine send me picture of they little hatchling with funny haircut. Me not read e-mail all that close cause it not contain money or nude picture or nothing but it seem that they little boy way bitching or begging or bugging them for something... So they gived him mohawk. Now, me not know about you, but me think that am genius! Haircuts grow out, but EVERYBODY know what it am like to walk around with bad haircut till it do. That am greatest system of punishment me have ever heard of. Me can here it now.... "Grrrrrr... You better shut up and do you chores junior, or we gonna carve 'Bedwetter' into you fade!" You just KNOW that kid am running to make that bed and whisking that trash out to curb!! Me would love to submit me good friends as parents of year, but think me not cause me not want child services coming down on them. So for same reason me can no tell you who them am.

But before me forget, me good friend DNA Vibrator send me E-mail about... Um... Something totally different. It seem that he put up short video of them in band from show they do back in we old college town. Me was there. It was great show... For what me remember. He say that if you download video, you can hear Monstee in crowd. Me took 4 or five days to download it (you know me system am that slow) And me listen, but me no hear it. If you go to listen, you can get file at him blog site or that other place. If you listen for Monstee, me sound like cross between Nick Nolte and Leon Redbone with laugh that sound like Burt Reynolds laugh but lowered 5 octaves and done in slow motion. Me have been told same thing about me bedroom skills... But where was me going?

OH YEAH! So about this kid with mohawk.... While me was looking at picture, what strike me as so cool about picture was not necessarily hairdo (what was really cool by way) But really surly slow burn expression on kids face. If you know any preteen boy... Me think you know that look. It hit me that that surly look fit SO well with mohawk me had hard time thinking of other look you would want with mohawk. Not silly grin. Not if you not want to get beat up. No, slow burn bad attitude and best to go with mohawk. But then me wonder.... Would same look work with OTHER hair styles??? Me HAD to know. SOOOOoooooooo.... Me get out me special tools and go to work bringing out inner meaning of look and extrapolating it with other hairstyles. Sometimes it work.... Sometimes it no work. YOU see what YOU think. Feel free to mix and match and such and let me know what you think works and what not works. Happy clicking!