The 36th of Monstemper!
or... Two Things.
Stupid sauce and me am begging to get me ass kicked
OK, so me missed few days... grow up and get over it. Ya know, you really should try to live life on you own without living vicariously through Monstee. But still... how can you? Me know, me know... calm down... it all right. Let we just get on with it.
If you no know how Monstee feel about advertising by now, then you am either new to cave or stupid piece of shit that can no remember to wipe you butt after letting you turds fall while you walk! Sorry, sorry.. me no mean to take it out on you. It just that them ad campaigns really REALLY get under me fur and sometimes me can no take it.
Like this one for A1 steak sauce. You seen it? One where guy am out tailgating with buddies and he ask them how they like they steaks and drips little bit of A1 on grill. Him and buddies look at little drip and him buddies say "No. No, dude. Let it go..." Then we see Mr. Grilling dipshit leaning in and next thing you know he am sitting on back of ambulance with bandage on him tongue asking "Ith my thteak Ok?" Me kinda wish me was there so me could say something like NO YOU DUMBSHIT! ME WIPED ME ASS ON IT AND LEFT IT IN PUDDLE OF PISS IN THE URINAL! YOU NO DESERVE GOOD PIECE OF MEAT!! YOU LICKED A HOT GRILL YOU WAS COOKING MEAT ON!!! IT WAS INCHES FROM RED HOT COALS!!!! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING?!?!?! But NOOOooooo... they just come back with product slogan. "Yeah, it's that good." How good? Good enough to make you act like a fucking retard?!?! No, no, no... most retarded people are STILL smart enough NOT to lick something that close to fucking FIRE!!! What stupid ad am this? 'Hey, eat our sauce cause it's so good you jab forks in you eyes just to get seconds!' FUCKIN' A!!! SIGN ME UP CAUSE ME WANT BUCKET OF THAT SHIT! 'No, wait guys! Get some of out NEW sauce and with one taste you want to rape and murder everyone around you regardless or gender!!!' WOOOHOOO!!! Give me KEG of that!!! 'Buy now and get bottle of our extra special limited offer super sauce! Just sniffing it makes you shit, piss, vomit, scream, pull out your hair, have seizure and die all at once!!!' FUCK ME SIDEWAYS WITH TWO BY FOUR!!! GET A GOD DAMED TANKER TRUCK!!!! Fuck you ad men! 'Yeah, it's that good.' Good enough to make us act like assholes? Go to hell.
On flip side, me guess not all ads am that bad. Me not sure how long this thing been going on but it seem that Always am advertising to women to 'Have a Happy Period.' And aint it bout time for something like that! Me god, this am the twenty-first century. You gals deserve something like that. Me glad you finally got it. ...not that me am all that sure what Always am... ...or what it sell... ...or that me WANT to know! REALLY! Ladies, that ok. You no need to explain. PLEASE feel free to keep all you womanly stuff to you woman's. Just let it be known that we am all happy you am now capable of having HAPPY period. Maybe now you get off our backs once and while. Me mean it not like we can really KNOW what you going through. It am just that we don't WANT to know what you am going through. We am out of loop and happy to be there. So, now that you can be happy too, we all happy. YEA! Good for all of us, and good for you being happy for change. 'After all, this is the time of the month that's all about you.' Well it'm you girl and you should know it, with each glance and every little movement you show it. Love am all around no need to waste it. You can have the town why don't you take it. You're gonna make it after all
Stupid sauce and me am begging to get me ass kicked
OK, so me missed few days... grow up and get over it. Ya know, you really should try to live life on you own without living vicariously through Monstee. But still... how can you? Me know, me know... calm down... it all right. Let we just get on with it.
If you no know how Monstee feel about advertising by now, then you am either new to cave or stupid piece of shit that can no remember to wipe you butt after letting you turds fall while you walk! Sorry, sorry.. me no mean to take it out on you. It just that them ad campaigns really REALLY get under me fur and sometimes me can no take it.
Like this one for A1 steak sauce. You seen it? One where guy am out tailgating with buddies and he ask them how they like they steaks and drips little bit of A1 on grill. Him and buddies look at little drip and him buddies say "No. No, dude. Let it go..." Then we see Mr. Grilling dipshit leaning in and next thing you know he am sitting on back of ambulance with bandage on him tongue asking "Ith my thteak Ok?" Me kinda wish me was there so me could say something like NO YOU DUMBSHIT! ME WIPED ME ASS ON IT AND LEFT IT IN PUDDLE OF PISS IN THE URINAL! YOU NO DESERVE GOOD PIECE OF MEAT!! YOU LICKED A HOT GRILL YOU WAS COOKING MEAT ON!!! IT WAS INCHES FROM RED HOT COALS!!!! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING?!?!?! But NOOOooooo... they just come back with product slogan. "Yeah, it's that good." How good? Good enough to make you act like a fucking retard?!?! No, no, no... most retarded people are STILL smart enough NOT to lick something that close to fucking FIRE!!! What stupid ad am this? 'Hey, eat our sauce cause it's so good you jab forks in you eyes just to get seconds!' FUCKIN' A!!! SIGN ME UP CAUSE ME WANT BUCKET OF THAT SHIT! 'No, wait guys! Get some of out NEW sauce and with one taste you want to rape and murder everyone around you regardless or gender!!!' WOOOHOOO!!! Give me KEG of that!!! 'Buy now and get bottle of our extra special limited offer super sauce! Just sniffing it makes you shit, piss, vomit, scream, pull out your hair, have seizure and die all at once!!!' FUCK ME SIDEWAYS WITH TWO BY FOUR!!! GET A GOD DAMED TANKER TRUCK!!!! Fuck you ad men! 'Yeah, it's that good.' Good enough to make us act like assholes? Go to hell.
On flip side, me guess not all ads am that bad. Me not sure how long this thing been going on but it seem that Always am advertising to women to 'Have a Happy Period.' And aint it bout time for something like that! Me god, this am the twenty-first century. You gals deserve something like that. Me glad you finally got it. ...not that me am all that sure what Always am... ...or what it sell... ...or that me WANT to know! REALLY! Ladies, that ok. You no need to explain. PLEASE feel free to keep all you womanly stuff to you woman's. Just let it be known that we am all happy you am now capable of having HAPPY period. Maybe now you get off our backs once and while. Me mean it not like we can really KNOW what you going through. It am just that we don't WANT to know what you am going through. We am out of loop and happy to be there. So, now that you can be happy too, we all happy. YEA! Good for all of us, and good for you being happy for change. 'After all, this is the time of the month that's all about you.' Well it'm you girl and you should know it, with each glance and every little movement you show it. Love am all around no need to waste it. You can have the town why don't you take it. You're gonna make it after all







3 Comments:
Wait...what?
Monstee, you're beautiful! really, I love it! go on, be out of the loop, it's a happy place to be! ;-D And uhm, I'm also glad you am no licking any grills, eh? ( You know, when I was young-ish, there was always the kid who spelled ~girl~ as ~gril~, so in effect, you could look at licking that ~grill~ in a different way now, you know? ) :-D
Me am wearing A1 steak sauce right now!
But now me want wash off, you big time convincing!
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