Monstee goes public and risks his life to talk to Kate
Oh Kate! (putting head in paws)
Kate, Kate, Kate, Kate, Kate. Why you have go mention THEM?
Me know, me know... you not know what you asking... but you did ask. Now me could make up big lie and try blow smoke up you skirt and give some witty type smartass remark, but that what got Monstee in trouble last time. No, me not going to make that mistake again. Me like new cave. Me not want move again. If me can no get around people asking Monstee about THEM, then me just going to have to tell all and hope it am enough to keep Monstee from disappearing. You see, Monstee know too much. Monstee know so much that me get little message from THEM. They say that if Monstee tell what he know then they might loose jobs and they might need find new street to live on. They say they no want to move and no like new street that happen to be named "Kill Monstee" street.
Now Monstee no want anybody go live on "Kill Monstee" street. So he stop telling what he know, pack up him things and move. When me make new start me thought it better to just say they no real and avoid whole matter altogether. But NOOOOOOOOOOOO. Kate have to go and sir up big mess all over again, get Monstee's tiny little inner voice squeaking at him again.(me call him squeaky) And me am no going to move either! If you think me am going to pack up old moldy box of porn you am crazy! So me guess me need tell you what me know, but me will NOT be using names. Well first, me get in trouble last time for outing two of them on internet. Hey, not that there am anything wrong with that. Me was just pointing out that here am two guys that have been living together for 36 years now and sleeping in matching twin beds in same bedroom. Me no want to get them kicked off they show or anything. Me just think they should be proud and allowed to march in parade now and again if they want. They good guys! They clean, neat, good cook, smell like soap! Good guys! Not like that other one. That one am the one that give me all grief. Me am Monstee! Me am big, hairy, blue, kookie monster. He am nothing like me! He am not big. He am not hairy. He not have curtains that match drapes, if you know what me mean. He not even start in on that cookie thing until me start calling Monstee Kookie Monster.
He am second place wannabe, no original, no new idea, gotta steal ideas from others, hack! He am bottle blue! That am right! He am bottle blue! And how you understand what he say am mystery to me. He am no good at talking. Him did try get on internet, when he hear ME doing well and good here. But he am so lame and out of date that it am laughable. HAHA, HAHAHA. Still, internet am better way to chat him because he smell bad! He always smell of whatever he eat in last 7 days, fungus, mold and sex funk.
Now that little one am not so little. He may act like little baby, but he am actually 24. He like to play like he am a baby, but he am really like one of them "adult" babies, if you know what me mean. He am mean too. Mean and VERY anti America. He say when time is rite he get little children to turn against parents in new regime. Till then, he wait, and play the baby. He no smell like baby, he smell like B.O. and burning flag. Now that skinny blue one am not as dumb as he let on. He plot and scheme and all time act like he am bumbling doof. Monstee had to dig a bit and sneak into him personal computer account with CTW, and guess what me find. Me find him have plans for world domination. Is seem that Osama DID have weapons of mass destruction. He have little red one hide them for him and little red one sell weapons to skinny blue one. You be ready! He am making plans!
Me did download one of TV ads him am planning to air when he am ready. He am freaky! He always spending free time in lab. He smell like rubbing alcohol and formaldehyde.
Me think it am important to mention that they not always be so evil and bad. They was always kept on short leash by they leader, the green one.
Him was ok. Him have bit of power and control problem, but he have plenty of underlings to take it out on. That was long ago. Since death of Kurt Cobain, the green one have not been much good no nothing. Him am only coherent few hours of day and work need him for that, rest of time him am in state of "self medication". It am shame. He smell like pond water and vomit.
So now you know. Me hope you keep this info close to heart and remember, if anything "sudden" happen to Monstee, it was THEM!
Labels: box of porn, list, Other Bloggers, pic, THEM
Scratched in cave wall by Monstee at 10:57 PM
2 Piles of Guano
